Bolus!

I love talking about the digestive system. Today, while reviewing, I asked "So, who remembers what the squishy mass of food is called?" A couple kids raised their hands. "You know, when your teeth grind it up, and your saliva breaks it down, and then you swallow it?"

Another kid asked "So, like when it's in your throat?"

I nodded. Then, with great vigor and enthusiasm, a great child I call President raised his hand with an audible "OOOH!" You could just see the light bulb going off.

"President, go!" I said.

"BALLS!" he cried.

The entire class silently stared at me. Held their collective breath. Terrible comebacks shot through my brain like fireworks. I sure hope you don't swallow balls. You keep balls in your throat? Grinding your balls with your teeth is probably not the best plan, but the flexibility is impressive. Oh my god. I could not say any of these things. The words, prisoners, trapped just behind my teeth, fighting to get out.

So, I did what any good teacher would do. I cracked up.

The class melted and President put his head in his hands. "That's not what I meant...."

"Would you like to try that again, Prez?"

"Bolus," he said sadly. "I meant to say bolus. I was just a few letters off...."

I made the class practice the word, and they all erupted into giggles again. Then, while diagramming the digestive system, we decided to draw the bolus sliding down the esophagus.

"Can I draw it as a circle?" one kid asked.
"Just don't draw it as TWO!" another replied.

Indeed. Please do not draw it as two.